Day 54: Test of Patience

Day 40 Revisted: Play a Pracitical Joke

After going over my work schedule for Sunday- Monday, I figured it's easiest just to stay at my parents house.  They live closer to all my jobs than I do.  I thought it would be nice to give them a warning.  I called my father, who did not answer, and left him a message telling him I was moving back in.  He has not responded... it's been over 9 hours.

Day 53: Today, Return All Your Junk Mail

Got my car and desk cleaned off.  I mailed back:

2 Domino's pizza mailings (I really don't need to be eating pizza)
1 Credit card application (considering the Gap gave me over a $2000 limit and I have a shopping problem, I thought 'let's be responsible')
STL marketplace magazine. 
Camel Cigarette brochure (????)
and just for laughs, a postcard from my pilates instructor.  I also addressed that one too B. Smith, Resources and Personnel Dept.

Day 52: Discover the Meaning of Life

Day 51: Sense- less Day

Go through today without using your sense of sight.

I never thought being blind for a day would be easy.  But I really didn't expect it to be boring.  I thought I would have some thrills like Jenna on Pretty Little Liars (which I did watch yesterday), but instead a spent a majority of the day sleeping.  It was constantly dark out and I had nothing else to do. 

I did however find it hard to perform normal task.  I don't know how blind people do it.  I managed to make it to the potty okay but still am not sure if there was toothpaste on my toothbrush.  When I was done with that, and it was obviously still dark out, I decided just to get back in bed.  To avoid breaking Michelle's mirror, I decided it would be best to climb in from the foot of the bed.  Only problem was I misgaged where the foot of the bed was and landed on the floor.  Same knee I hit yesterday.  After resting my sore sore knee, I decided it was time to eat lunch.  Luckily I had some chicken that I could microwave, but that was taking too long and the chicken was starting to explode.  I took off my blindfold and saw that I still had 13 minutes to go.  I figured, senseless day: OVER.

Day 50: Make People Notice You Today

Day 49: Make a Citizen's Arrest!

I'm so glad this fell on Vito's night.

I booked her, finger printed her and took her mug shots. I really think the police department should hire me.  I can arrest people for all their wrong doings.

Day 48: First Impressions

Today I was supposed to find out what a stranger thought of me.  I asked the customer service person at Target.  I mean, what else is customer service for. 

I've also been told I have a great smile. To quote Ms. G from work, "we'll take that smile."  I am pretty awesome.

Before I drugged myself.

Good News!

I found a sequel to this book.  So, if the world does not end December 21, 2012 (the Mayanologist on WifeSwap yesterday said there is a good chance it's not going to happen.  Apperently Mayan predictions are often wrong), then this blog will continue.

My thoughts on December 21, 2012:  I was a believer, but if the Mayanologist says no, then I have to think about it.  But I am thinking because of all the End of the World parties, people will be so hungover and near death the next day that the world will end, but just for the day because then we'll recover.

Day 47: Tonight Count the Sheep to Help Cure Insomnia

This one came at a good time.  After being able to stay up late for four days in a row I was slightly nervous on how I was going to fall asleep tonight.  I was just planning on drugging myself like I usually do (cops, no need to bust down the door, I take a swig of Nyquil).  But now I'll just count sheep and hopefully fall asleep and be well rested when I wake up at 5 am tomorrow.

Day 46: Birthday Day

Today I am just supposed to write down all my friend's birthdays so I don't forget.  I do that immediately every time I buy a new planner, if I remember it.  It's a shame I'm not showing someone this blog yet, cause then we can find out if they are a scorpio or sagittirus.  Oh well.

I'd like to give a shot out to Karen, who turns 29 tomorrow!  Go, Karen!

Day 45: Defy Superstition

Mardi Gras: Romance Day

Today I am supposed to come up with a compliment that has never been made before.  Darcy and I came up with a pick up line instead: Let's get nude (classier than naked) inside a porter potty.  To make it a compliment: so I can see your beautiful friend/s.

I hate Mardi Gras!

Day 43: Write Proper Diary Account of Your Day

What a day! Workin the morning, signed up to work the summer.  Work in the evening.  Had doctor appointment, lunch with Sheryl and Christina at Chili's (yummy).  Took 4 Advil at once because I couldn't walk. That is an amazing experience.  I was so happy.  But I did accidently buy a seal thinking it was a cat.  Oh well.

Day 42: Walk Barefoot Through the Grass

Of course it has to be wet and somewhat cold outside!

But while I was walking through the grass (at my parents' house, my neighbors have dogs and I didn't want to step in poo) I saw the quarter I had glued down for my dad.  This is the point I realized my 63 year old father is blind.

Ps.  There was dog doodie in my yard when I got home.

Day 41: Apply For a Knighthood

I can be a knight.  They are pretty important and I'm pretty important too.  Apparently other people who have been granted knighthood were people who were head nurse for 60 years (snooze), a Nobel Peace Prize winner (lame), someone who raised millions for an obscure charity (please, I donated at least $75 and a whole bunch of clothes I didn't want anymore to charity last year), a person who served in minor government position for their whole life (really?), a person who won WWII (not fair, I wasn't even alive then) and someone who saved a cat from an extra tall tree (that one is going to be hard to beat). But I guess when I allowed the little weird girl to be seen with me in public, that should totally push me over the top for knighthood.  Please, from now on, call me Dame Jenn.

Valentine's Day: Today Play a Practical Joke

The snow and having to sub today totally ruined my original plan for my joke.  I was going to whoopie cushion Michelle or glue a coin to the ground and watch my dad struggle (which I might do tomorrow).  Instead, I went with the classic Kick Me sign on Michelle's back.  Unfortunately, she knew what I was doing.

Valentine's Day:  I texted Becky to let her know even though she tore my heart out by rejecting me, I wanted to wish her a Happy Valentine's Day.  She said it was the first smile she'd had all day.  Being gay for a day, might finally be paying off.

Day 39: Learn to Speak Swedish!

Day 38: Spend Some Time at Church Today

Day 37

Fate Hath Done Me Wrong!!!

Having a random drawing was probably the dumbest thing I've ever thought of!  When a dude who I know was trying to get into my pants at one point, pulls out "help me make a baby," it's all over!  He's excited and now I'm hiding in fear.

But I did get a free lunch out of this.  Thanks, Sheryl... and I guess Fate.

Day 36: Today Give Little Tasks to People Around You

Day 35: Say Nothing

So today I'm suposed to say nothing.  Considering it's my first day at a new job, I don't think this is going to happen.  I am working with children, so I guess I can say nothing profound today.  That shouldn't be too hard.

Day 34: Write to a Dictator to End Torture

I was going to write to the dictator of Iran.  Mainly because I've wanted to go to Tehran since I worked at Macy's (boo!) with Ella.  But then I thought, since Iran is a no fly zone, is it a no mail zone?

Then I wanted to write to my high school kids because they are torturing me.  I mean if all a dictator is is someone who tortures people, then there's about 50 dictators in the making.  Hell, half of them act like they rule the world anyway.  But I wasn't really sure how to get a letter to those specific ones.

I guess I'll write to that Korean guy and maybe send him a McDonald's coupon while I'm at it.

Day 33: Unexpectedly Continued

Day 33: Be On the Lookout for the Paranormal

They gave me this list:

Which actually has me thinking.  I had originally thought that the noises I was hearing was a girl locked in the attic.  But ghost make more sense since I don't think this building has an attic. 

My kitchen cupboards were open this morning, but I had just assumed that was because I forgot to close them (I have been washing dishes for three days straight now).  It also explains those pains in my kidney.  I know the times I've told Michelle and my intern there was a ghost stabbing my kidney, they laughed it off and told me to drink less alcohol.  But what really has me thinking is this:

                                                                                  Is that blood on my walls?



Day 32: Tonight Control Your Dreams Part 2

Totally did not do this successfully.  I dreamt a tornado came and sucked up the state of Missouri.  Then I also dreamt about an obnixious friend from high school.  Maybe the tornado is metaphor for plane and friend from high school is a cross between a hedgehog and midget.  So success!

Day 32: Tonight Control Your Dreams

So some Freud guy said that we have control over your dreams.  I'm supposed to test this hypothesis.  Today I am thinking very hard about a hedgehog, a plane, and a midget. 

See you first thing in the morning (not working til 3 tomorrow, so it might be afternoon).

Day 31: Nauru Awareness Day

Today I am to send a postcard to the president of Nauru to let them know they are not completely forgotten.  Unfortunately, after the slumber party I was exhausted and after driving to my new job (starting tomorrow!) I was ready to lay down and did not feel like looking for a postcard.  Luckily, I have postcard paper at my house and decided just to send the president a homemade postcard.  Homemade means more.  It shows I care.  

Also, for those of you who also want to celebrate Nauru, here is some information.  I recommend watching on full screen on Youtube.

Their address:

Office of the President
c/o Ministry of Works
Yaren, Nauru

Day 30: Ignore Today

At first I wasn't sure what this day meant.  But now I do.  After rolling home at 4:15 in the morning, full of White Castle, I want to ignore this day.  I want to pretend that it is still yesterday. The day when I had enough intelligence not to eat a boatload of White Castle. 

More than likely, the air freshner will be coming out tomorrow, the day I am ignoring

Day 29

Day 28: Yes No

Today you are not allowed to use the words "yes" or "no."

I never actually realized how much I do not realize I am saying.  I honestly can't recall if I used yes or no today.  I kept reminding myself not to, but did I?  I know this morning Tim (John's out. Tim's in) texted me asking me a question about Britney Spears and I began to write "no" before remembering I was not allowed to answer that way.  When I was getting finger printed I'm not sure if I said "yes" when they called my name.  But I am pretty sure I did say "yes" when Lauren asked me if the shoes I was wearing were the ones I bought during class last week. 

But... I do know I did not say "no" when the creepy guy asked me if I wanted to do something fun with him this weekend.  Since I couldn't say "no," I just opted not to respond.

Day 27: Choose Your Final Meal on Death Row and Make It

I just bought what I would like my death row meal to be.  I'm not going to be making it.  Half way through I was praying for my lethal injection. 

Death Row Cannibal Denied Last Meal:  Archie Williams, 36, was denied his last meal before his execution in July 2002.  Reports from the prison state that Williams had requested that he be served his cellmate, John Peirson.  Peirson who was also on death row aswaiting his execution had agreed to let himself be fed to his friend after his death.  "They had some sort of death pact with each other a few weeks before they were set to be executed," stated Kevin March, Warden of the San Angelo Maximum Security Prison. "The state is not in the habit of granting such odd and disgusting requests."